When you were saying your vows, you meant every word you said because you were dreaming of a lifelong love. Nonetheless, marriage life comes with many challenges like lack of romance or infidelity that make it difficult for you to continue living with your partner. The divorce can come as a surprise or could be something you have anticipated for a long time based on the relationship with your significant other.
Either way, the consequences of the legal process are long-lasting and could have severe legal and emotional implications. Luckily, you can take specific steps to protect yourself, your property, and your children. If you believe the divorce procedure will be challenging or contested, you should not protect yourself by emptying your bank accounts or matrimonial house. Instead, you should take measures to protect your interests and ensure a favorable outcome.
This article highlights some of the ways you can protect yourself in divorce. Nonetheless, the information is helpful if you are undergoing an antagonistic process and not an uncontested one. These are just suggestions and not legal advice or opinion, although you can borrow a few ideas depending on your case’s circumstances.
Hire an Experienced Attorney
When going into a divorce case, you need the backing of the best family law attorney in California. You must hire a family attorney to help you with the proceeding.
In some divorce cases, the separating couple agrees to share custody, property, finances, and assets amicably without introducing an attorney. However, when you or your spouse contest the legal process, you need an experienced divorce lawyer to explain your options. Further, having handled cases like yours in the past, you can trust an attorney to streamline the process and make it as painless as possible.
San Diego has many divorce attorneys, but very few are competent to handle your case. When hiring, ask for referrals from friends or relatives who have been in your situation before and obtained a good outcome.
When receiving the referrals, you want to know if the person referring you obtained the best services. Some of the questions you can ask about the attorney they recommend include:
- Does the lawyer answer phone calls or emails promptly?
- Did they listen to your needs and understand?
- Were you judged?
- How many divorce cases like yours have they dealt with before?
After you have narrowed down your list of attorneys, you should contact them directly and schedule a face-to-face or over-the-phone meeting. During this meeting, ask all questions regarding your case and evaluate the legal experts’ responses.
Divorce is a legal proceeding you do not want in the spotlight. Therefore, you must find an attorney who will do due diligence to protect your privacy. Opt for someone discrete, confidential, and dedicated to ensuring your privacy.
Also, you want to evaluate the attorney’s strengths and weaknesses. Divorce cases have many aspects, including property, financial, child custody, and support. If you agree on almost everything about the separation with your soon-to-be ex-spouse apart from child support, you want an attorney whose strengths are in this area. When the differences with your spouse arise from property division, you want an attorney who has previously handled multiple property cases. These legal representatives are familiar with the processes followed by these cases and the obstacles faced. Therefore, they will use the experiences to evade these obstacles, streamlining the divorce process and making it seamless.
Lastly, your divorce case has a chance of ending up in court. If you are likely to have a litigation divorce case, you want a professional who has represented clients in court before. A legal representative like this understands court processes and how matters are likely to play out, which makes you well prepared for the court date and increases the chances of a favorable outcome.
Again, if there are chances your case will end up in trial, you need to consider the cost of the attorney you are hiring. Many attorneys out in the market try to appeal to potential clients by offering services at the lowest prices. Sadly, legal experts offering their legal counsel at low prices often offer compromised services. Even if hiring a cheap attorney will save you money, you can lose more money or assets when the trial outcome is not in your favor.
Nevertheless, hiring a highly trained divorce litigator with excellent skills and experience will require digging deeper into your pockets. Although expensive, these litigators will prepare intensely for the case and ensure you obtain the outcome you desire. Before picking a legal expert based on price, ensure you gather quotes from multiple litigators and pick one with reasonable rates and uncompromised legal counsel.
Protect Your Rights and Those of the Children
Even though you and your spouse will suffer through the divorce proceeding, children are not left out. They suffer mental and psychological pain knowing their parents are fighting. Therefore, as you work hard to protect your rights, you should also be protecting those of your children. Some of the ways you can achieve this include:
1. Consider Living in the Family Home
When you disagree with your partner and plan to separate, you can be thinking of moving out. If you are fighting with your partner, staying under the same roof can create tension, leading to physical confrontations, fights, or domestic violence incidents. These could make the divorce chaotic and result in criminal charges for domestic violence or assault. However, leaving your children behind in the family is not advisable because it will be detrimental to the children. The best move is to remain in the house and avoid friction until the divorce process concludes. If this is not an option, you should consider time sharing the family home. If you do not leave the family house, you will have the upper hand in the child custody case, unlike when you move out. Time-sharing is a favorable option because it minimizes friction and ensures you continue living in your home.
In the event of a domestic violence incident against you or your children, call the law enforcement and insist they send someone over to your home to file a report. Besides, you should reach out to your divorce lawyer right away. Consider a restraining or protective order if you are afraid another domestic abuse incident will occur.
2. Do Not Let Your Spouse take the Children and Leave
As parents, you all have equal rights over your children. So, if your spouse wants to leave, they must leave the children behind in the marital home. No parent has more rights than the other. The other option is time sharing the family home until the case's conclusion. And if a dispute occurs, you should obtain a temporary protective order prohibiting your spouse from taking the children out of California.
3. Demand Joint Custody
You are encouraged not to move out of your family home and leave your children behind because of the issue of joint custody. You want to spend more time with the children from the beginning of the case to deny the judge any reason not to grant your joint custody demand.
Protect Your Finances
Your finances play a critical role in your life after the marriage ends. Therefore, when a divorce is imminent, you must protect your monies. Steps towards protecting your finances include:
Gathering Financial Documents
Once you start thinking about divorce, you must put together all financial records, including bank statements, income statements, investment documents, mortgage paperwork, and other relevant papers for both you and your spouse. Even if they fail to provide copies during the divorce procedure, it will not hinder or delay the case.
Cancel All Jointly-Owned Credit Cards
Any debt incurred during the period you were married will be split during a divorce. Therefore, you want to reduce your debts as much as possible to avoid a huge financial burden when living alone. Also, you wish to cancel all joint credit cards to prevent your spouse from going on a spending spree and putting you in considerable debt. Do not inform your partner you are revoking the credit cards because even five minutes are enough to charge the cards thousands of dollars. Only tell them of the cancellation after you have done it.
However, when you inform your spouse before canceling the credit cards, and they charge excessive money, you can call the credit card firm and report your cards stolen to terminate the accounts. Doing so will only cost you $50.
Split Jointly-Owned Bank Accounts
If you own joint accounts with your partner, split them into separate personal accounts. You should do this because an angry spouse who unexpectedly learns of an impending divorce can clean out the jointly-owned bank account. Therefore, you should act swiftly and transfer half of the savings in the joint account to a personal account in a different bank. After, pleasantly inform your spouse of your actions through an on-paper letter from your lawyer.
Transferring your share of money from the joint account to a private one can be deemed playing dirty or seeking revenge, but it is necessary if you can demonstrate you only withdrew your hard-earned money.
Lower Unnecessary Expenses Right Away
Arrange a meeting with your partner and decide on the unnecessary expenses you must reduce, like extra phone lines. When you choose to separate from your partner, you should start saving for your life alone and the children, and one way of achieving this is by reducing expenses. Additionally, you can sell extra vehicles or other items you do not need. Once the divorce procedure is complete, the property acquired during the marriage will be considered community property and cannot be sold until it is split.
Stop your Retirement Contributions
Your spouse is entitled to part or all the funds in the retirement account or pension scheme. Therefore, before the separation process starts, talk to your boss to stop the contributions to the account. The savings your spouse is entitled to will be paused, leaving you with a sizeable paycheck to help you in the future.
Protect your Assets and Personal Property
Community property statutes ensure property accumulated during a marriage is split equally among the spouses. Again, you can safeguard your personal property or assets through proper documentation. Some of the tips for doing this include:
1. Keep Tight Records
You can protect your interests and simplify your attorney’s work by obtaining and making copies of your personal and business records. When you fail to act fast, and the case begins in court, you must subpoena your spouse to obtain them, which is time-consuming. The records you need include:
- Real estate property deeds and titles
- Stock receipts
- Retirement account statements
- Income tax returns
- Bank statements
- Credit card statements
Any paperwork that relates to your assets or property is critical in negotiations, and your attorney must know about them to protect your interests. If you run a joint business, ensure transparent records to avoid unnecessary quarrels.
Once you have obtained all the necessary personal and business records, move them to a secure location. You should produce two copies of the original documents and keep one print in a safe place. Share the other photocopy with your other half and take the original one to your litigator for safekeeping.
2. Keep a Record of all Marital Property
The best way to catalog your marital property is by recording a video camera with the help of your soon-to-be ex-spouse. If they are unwilling, you can record the video and duplicate a copy. Ensure that your video copy is stored away from home for safeguarding. You should keep an inventory of the entire family home and its items. While doing this, pull house contents out from the drawers and shelves to where they are visible. As you record the video of the valuables, ensure the date function is on for the date the video was recorded to be visible on the tape. Besides, you should catalog storage units or safety deposit box items. When something goes missing, you will have evidence of what is missing.
3. Keep Valuable Personal Property
Personal property acquired as gifts or inheritance is off-limits for asset division. You should create a list of these items, take photos and move them to a secure location away from your spouse. You will be surprised what a vengeful spouse can do to these personal items, including destroying them. Therefore, discuss your personal property with your partner. Once you have agreed on what is rightfully yours, move it to a safer location, primarily when considering moving out of the family home.
If you forget anything, you can always pick it up. And when your spouse denies you entry to the house or changes the lock, you can hire a locksmith to help you access the place without contravening the law. Breaking into your family home can only be illegal if the court has ruled on the divorce and awarded the house entirely to your spouse.
Even as you move these properties to a secure location, you must obtain adequate info about them to prove ownership. Further, you must determine whether your spouse placed any liens or used the property as loan collateral.
Protect Yourself
Your interests as an individual are paramount in divorce cases. The steps you can take to protect these personal interests are:
Record Daily Events
When going through a divorce, it is wise to jot down all the events in your life, including the time spent with your children, fights between you and your spouse, or telephone calls. All these details are relevant to the case and should be recorded and stored to strengthen your case. You can keep a personal journal where to write down these events. In the journal, stick to facts and avoid writing your emotions or reflections because overly-emotional statements can affect the case’s outcome if the journal is subpoenaed and used as evidence.
Avoid Signing Anything without Proper Consultation with your Attorney
Never sign any documentation provided by your spouse unless your lawyer takes a keen look. You can lose your child custody or property battle if you do so because even an attorney cannot modify these after signing. When your spouse insists on signing particular documents, politely tell them you are willing, but your attorney must review them first.
Be Ready for False Claims
Your spouse is likely to make false assertions against you to gain an advantage in the divorce proceeding. You can face false allegations of child abuse or domestic violence. When this happens, reach out to your family attorney immediately and explain the circumstances leading to the false claims.
Find a San Diego Divorce Lawyer Near Me
When you need help protecting yourself in a divorce proceeding, our competent lawyers at the San Diego Divorce Attorney can defend you. Reach out to us at 858-529-5150 before filing for divorce for the unwavering support and focus on your needs and interests. Our litigators will protect you from unfair custody and property division circumstances, ensuring a favorable outcome.
